Encouragement grounded in Scripture
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WWJD: Envy
Love does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 1 Corinthians 13:5, NIV
“Must be nice.”
I was taken aback. This was my favorite show. Grey’s. One of my favorite characters. Bailey. Who always supported other women. Now, spewing these words about a woman who decided she wanted to follow her dreams and chart a new course for her life. “Must be nice.”
Why was I taken aback? Because I have said them before. Haven’t you?
Must be nice to be able to get a new car. Must be nice to quit your job and not work. Must be nice to be able to go on vacation. Must be nice to have summers off. Must be nice to… You can insert whatever object, whatever lifestyle, whatever luxury you believe a person relishes in, that you wish you had here…
What is this? This “must be nice” kind of vibe we have when we encounter someone who has more? Has done more? Maybe even just wants more? It’s our human, flesh-bound desire for more. More stuff. More praise. More of this world. The ways of jealousy are mentioned in James 4:2-3, and it’s a powerful statement of how it can breed not so very wholesome things in our hearts:
You want what you don’t have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can’t get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them. Yet you don’t have what you want because you don’t ask God for it. And even when you ask, you don’t get it because your motives are all wrong—you want only what will give you pleasure. (NLT)
“Must be nice.”
But, there’s nothing nice about jealousy. It is the very opposite of love. It is the very opposite of showing love of God. It is how we show love of status, things, money, sometimes people, and prestige.
And, when we don’t have these. If we know someone, or are around someone who has something we don’t have….think about. These have to ring a bell (I am talking to myself, too..I have not been immune): Why did she get that job? I was WAY more qualified? Why do they always get the praise and awards? Wonder who they are sucking up to. She is so skinny, and dresses so nice. I bet she is a stuck up, snob.
And if you are feeling bad, the Bible has examples of these very types of things. We come from a long line of jealous peeps. Cain murdered his brother Abel because God liked his sacrifice better. Sarah sent Hagar away because she could have children and Sarah could not (after she schemed for the child..that’s a whole other story). And Jesus…come on, the Pharisees did everything they could to trick Jesus, because he was smarter and kinder. And well, Judas. Let’s not forget Jesus and Judas.
But we don’t have to stay jealous. Walking around and lacking love for another just because they were gifted differently. Given something you weren’t.
Live differently than you do, in a way you have no clue and are merely judging from appearance. Because yes, that car is nice…but it could be paid for. Yes, it would be nice to not work, but they could be in forced unemployment. And yes, I can attest…summers are nice to have off, but the time between August and June is oh-so-hard.
We may do different things we think are nice, but we all have God.
And while they may have more things. More awards. More whatever you may want here on earth. There is something God is really jealous of, too. His love.
You must not bow down to them or worship them, for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God who will not tolerate your affection for any other gods. Exodus 20:5
Those other gods? You may consider them to be those golden statues people bowed down to in the Old Testament. But these days those idols are anything that keeps us from loving God fully. Because He wants ALL our love. And we can’t love Him fully if we are coveting our neighbor’s car, job status, new promotion, new accolades, or lifestyle. If we are striving for love from other things like money, fame, or people.
Turn your attentions to Him. Turn your envy to Him. Ask God to come and fill you with what you need and desire. He longs for this attention, and He wants ALL of you.
“Must be nice.”
Yes. Yes, it most certainly is.
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Just see Jesus
Oh, I have days I lose the fight
Try my best but just don’t get it right
Well I talk a talk that I don’t walk
And miss the moments right before my eyes. -Zach Williams, Less Like MeI know what that’s like. I aim daily to “fight the good fight.” But…there are days I fail. I may judge too critically. I may curse. I may cut someone off in traffic. I may fall. Oh, I may fall. I am human. I am trying to walk like Jesus, but I don’t get it right. There are days I miss the mark.
I was sitting in my telehealth space one morning contemplating this art of being an example of Jesus. Thinking about the ways I may not have been. How I could be better. Feeling like a failure in one moment, and remembering grace in another.
Why grace?
Well, I heard a song. Because if you remember He often speaks to me that way…and it was what I was thinking at that moment. The only thing I wanted people to see in me was Jesus. I wanted to set THAT example. And maybe I messed up, but grace gave me the opportunity to be Jesus to others.
Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
Because His grace allows me to get up when I fall. To say, “Yes…I messed up. But God…He picks me back up. He sets my feet on the right path so I can get right with Him again. So I can reflect His image, and be more like His son. Be an example of His love. His goodness.”
Because that’s the thing. Sure, there are things here on earth that would be great to do. Accomplishments I would love to achieve. Things I would love to have. Applause is nice. Compliments feel good for a moment. And an award here and there is great for the ego. Success looks good on social media or a resume.
But…it fills for a moment. You may be remembered for a time. Your name may be dropped here and there. But for me-it doesn’t matter.
It’s not about me.
It’s about Jesus.
Because I can’t pick myself up. When I fall, I need Him to get me on track. It’s Him who gave me the talents that make me a success. And if no one remembers my name, I hope they say this: That woman…yeh, don’t remember her name, but with her, I knew I was with Jesus.
A little more like mercy, a little more like grace
A little more like kindness, goodness, love, and faith
A little more like patience, a little more like peace
A little more like Jesus, oh, a little less like me
A little more of living everything I preach
A little more like Jesus, a little less like meI don’t need them to see or remember me, only Jesus. Let them just see Jesus.
*I do not own rights to music/songs, or lyrics.
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Giving me a “right” hand
We had put it off for a while. The dentist. The youngest needed a mouth full of work, and with anxiety and sensory needs that kept him from even liking to have his teeth cleaned…we had put it off for months. But we had prepared him for this day. Explained what would occur, how he would feel before. That he would sleep during. Wouldn’t feel a thing.
Of course, as a mom-I was the one having all the feels. As he received the first anesthetic that put him to sleep in the waiting room. As he laid his head onto my right shoulder, and uttered he felt “weird.” As he dozed off. As the dentist and anesthesiologist carried him off to the back, I sat with his mask and glasses beside me. Held them in my right hand and held back tears.
Wishing I could hold his hand in that room. Knowing I had to wait here, but there was someone else with him back there.
As I sat in that waiting room waiting for updates. To be given the OK to go back and be “mom” again, I thought about my own experience on his side. In rooms with anesthesia needles. Only doctors and nurses I didn’t know there to hold my hand.
I had recently had surgery of my own. Not my first experience like his, but an experience nonetheless. A fall on my wrist was the reason. Now, I am right-handed. And while I don’t know the suffering of losing a limb, I know the ordeal of having to learn to use your fingers, your grip, and your dominant hand in the way you once did. While I had a left hand to help do some of the things my dominant right hand couldn’t do, my left hand couldn’t write. It couldn’t type. It couldn’t do the things that had been so easy before. Like pick up anesthesia weary kids and carry them to waiting surgery beds. This right hand…it wasn’t the same.
I also hate feeling helpless, so needing help turning door knobs, or picking up a plate got old, and I was determined to get my strength back.
But…here’s the thing-He was with me just as He was with my wee one. In those rooms, and through that period of healing. Because He is the one who is always beside us giving His “right” hand.
Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. Isaiah 41:10And again in Psalm 18:35, we are reminded again: Your right hand supports me;
your help has made me great.And what is the significance of being provided God’s “right” hand? There are over 130 references in the Bible to the right hand, so surely there must be a significant reason for this. In many references are made to God’s strength. His help. His victory. Something I needed when I lost the use of my “right” hand. Something I often feel I have nothing left of when it comes to being a mom.
And I know I am not the only one. Parenting is not for the faint of heart. You will have seasons when things seem easy. And then a roadblock comes along and the road becomes long and hard again. You wonder if you have what it takes, or if you are just messing your kids up. Or maybe they are messing you up. You really can’t tell anymore.
Why the right hand? Why didn’t God choose the left? Think about it-the right hand of God? It denotes a location of honor, and according to Matthew Henry’s Commentary, when thinking about the reference to the “right hand” in the passage above, Isaiah 41:10-the Israelites were God’s honored people, His chosen. The reference to God’s right hand was meant to provide encouragement to them. That they would not be abandoned, be left discouraged. That he would strengthen them, help them, not allow them to break, and prevent them from falling too hard.
You know who else is honored? Moms. Anyone who is “like a mom.” Or who cares for others.
And so He will do the same for you.
Give you his “right” hand.
So that when your wee one, reaches for yours when he is fresh out of anesthesia and flipping out, you are there to give it-oh so gently, while you rub his soft, long curls with your left one.
When you get home, look down at that hand, the one with little strength to pick up anything, you scoop that wee one up into your arms anyway, because he is yours. Like you are His. Knowing you won’t leave him, like He hasn’t left you. You will stay by his side through this fight that he doesn’t get, just like He stayed by you.
Like He has so many times before. By your “right” side fighting for you. As you fought for him. For so many. You. You honored one. You. You chosen one. You who may be weak and broken. Fallen down for a time. Without the strength of your hand, but never without your constant “right” hand.
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WWJD: Kindness
Never let loyalty and kindness leave you!
Tie them around your neck as a reminder.
Write them deep within your heart. Proverbs 3:3, NLTKindness. What do we often think of when we think of random acts of kindness? Pretty words? Random gifts?
The second portion of 1 Corinthians 13:4 states that LOVE is kind. But think about it…can someone give really good gifts, and speak charming and prettied up words, and not have any loving motive behind them? Of course they can. Paul addresses this in the first three verses of that famous chapter, when he says: If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. 1 Corinthians 13:1,3, MSG
Yes. We can speak beautifully. We can give great gifts. And not be loving, or even very kind.
So then…what is kindness? What does it mean to express kindness in ways that show love to others?
According to Stephen and Alex Kendrick, authors of the book The Love Dare, “Kindness is love in action.” Action. How we SHOW kindness. Yes, it is how we speak, and what we give, but it is more than those things. It is how we make others feel. How we express love to others in what we DO. And it encompasses a number of things that sometimes have nothing to do with the words we say, or the things we can give with our money.
Kindness is also tenderness, which in other words is the care and concern for the welfare of another person. It is sensitivity to their needs. Compassion and warmth. We are not harsh when we speak, even if we have to correct. And let’s be real-kind people do have to correct, but they do so with a soft tone of voice; while speaking the truth.
Kindness is willingness, or goodwill and a desire to serve another to meet their needs, the ones we are sensitive to. It is going out of ones way to provide assistance, even if it may mean we have to put our desires to the side. It is not just giving money or material things, but giving of one’s time and attention.
Kindness moves. It doesn’t sit around and wait for someone to act first. To make the first move. “Well, I will show compassion and take care of his/her needs, when mine are taken care of.” It sees a need, and takes the initiative to meet it, whether that person asks or not. It hears of someone’s strife or heartache, and lends an ear whether that person seeks you out first or not. It gets off the couch and moves towards the hurting. Towards the broken. Towards the suffering. Towards the object of one’s concern and love-not away.
It’s like this story we have probably heard many times, one found in Luke 10:25-27. It’s the story of the Good Samaritan. We know the gist of the story. The headline today would read: “Jewish man harmed in vicious attack, and left for dead.” Two men walked by him. Upstanding men. One a priest, the other an assistant in the temple. Neither stopped to take care of him because it would inconvenience them. Surely thinking, “Oh, poor thing. He’s hurt. Sorry about that. But…it’s really not my concern. Nothing I can really do about it. Moving on with what I got to do today. Don’t really have time for this.”
“Then a despised Samaritan came along, and when he saw the man, he felt compassion for him. Going over to him, the Samaritan soothed his wounds with olive oil and wine and bandaged them. Then he put the man on his own donkey and took him to an inn, where he took care of him.” Luke 10: 34-35, NLT
A despised man. Who wasn’t even supposed to talk to a Jew. He was the example of kindness. Tenderness. Willingness. Initiative. Action.
Love.
So now the question is-which one are we? The one not willing to be inconvenienced or bothered with someone else’s trouble; or the one moving to act? To show kindness? To show love?
“Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.” 1 John 3:18
Let’s not be rusty gates with what we believe are the words people want to hear, then doing the opposite. Lets move in love. Act in love. Show our love.
Remember-“Kindness is love in action,” so as that song mentioned long ago…perhaps it’s time for a little less talk and a lot more action. A lot more love. A lot more kindness.
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Shut the door, and get yo’ praise on
Enter his gates with thanksgiving; go into his courts with praise. Psalm 100:4, NLT
I have always enjoyed music, and have been singing in a choir of sorts since I was in 4th grade. My fondest memories have music attached to them. And when I need to shut out the voices in my head-music is my go-to.
Music. It is also how God has pursued me. Did you realize this? That God is always pursuing you? Like someone desperately in love, He sends you messages to let you know He is present. That He is always there. To remind you of Him. To show you His love.
They are often subtle. Not always burning bush moments. Or a booming voice shouting from the heavens.
Sometimes they are songs.
That is how he has always spoken to me. Even before I knew how much He loved me.
I could go on and on about the ways in which He used songs to speak to me before I realized it, but one song I remember specifically is one we sang in my high school choir. One I watched 20 years later as a teen from youth group sang it again at that same high school. I still remember that song.
Shut de do, keep out the devil. Shut de do keep the devil in the night.
Now, there has been some controversy about the original song. The dialect. The “supposed” culture it may have originated from. It’s origin. However, I like to research songs. Why they are written. And I always research lyrics, especially those our teens are singing…I want to know what they are ACTUALLY singing and saying.
Oh, Satan is an evil charmer, (shut the door, keep out the devil)
He’s hungry for a soul to hurt, (shut the door, keep the devil in the night)
And without your holy armour, listen to me, (shut the door, keep out the devil)
He will eat you for dessert, yes, he will. (shut the door, keep the devil in the night) (Source)And if you aren’t convinced by the lyrics, well because of the controversies, then maybe this will convince of you of the devil’s prowess: Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8, NLT
So…He can use music to get the message across that you need to rely on Him. He can use music to help you shut out the faulty messages that the devil keeps pounding in your brain. He can send you music to remind you that you are not alone. He can send you a lyric to calm you. To answer a question you sent Him in a prayer. To remind you of your worth.
He can send a song to save you. To pursue you. So you finally accept Him.
He can speak through songs. It is in fact why musicians continue to write them, Sing them. Praise Him.
Because He can speak through a song.
Maybe you don’t know how to find the right one. Those old hymns don’t speak to your heart. You are an old, school rap child. In need of a sick beat. Not an organ (though He speaks through those, too). I get it. I am, too. So I am here to help Him speak through the music. As the spirit leads me on Monday’s I will share a song He has placed on my heart, and share it with you. May it remind you that you are not alone. May it send a reminder of your worth to Him. May it come to save you, help you accept Him. May it speak to you, and help you keep out the devil with His song.
About Me
I am January! Wife, mother, meemaw, pastor, and mental health provider who makes it through the day with my coffee, my journal, and my God. A simple human, navigating life through the messy and sometimes chaotic. All focused on Him.
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Grace 'n Grounds 