Encouragement grounded in Scripture
Rooted in truth. Anchored in Christ.
New reflections weekly.
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WWJD: Still casting stones?
Love doesn’t keep score of the sins of others. 1 Corinthians 13:5, MSG
My husband and I have had to do some crawling back. Crawling back to the beginning of what we had at year one of a 15 year marriage. In doing so we read, and we began reading a devotion weekly that tackled some difficult junk.
Let’s jump back for a second. Read the header of this blog post. “Straight Up Messy Truth.” Does that give you a clue that I will not shy away from the mess? And folks, marriage? It is messy. This may not be what you thought you would hear today, but hang on-if your marriage is not messy, and you do not fight. You do not have a struggle, or have not had hardship-hold on…it is coming. Or, you are hiding something. Because straight up-we are human. We are messy. And every single one of our relationships will be, too. Even those we vow to remain in “til death do us part.”
Now, back to that devotional…and another mess. In the beginning of this particular exercise the authors of the book Closer, Jim and Cathy Burns recall the story of the woman caught in adultery: “The woman was first brought to Jesus in shame. Jewish law was clear she could be stoned to death. (We still don’t know why the man involved in the sin was missing).”
I had never thought of that before. When I read it…wow, I became angry. Bitter. How dare she be dragged into the streets to be stoned, and he…he was just able to walk away. She had to stand before all these people, shamed for her sin. And where, where was he?
This was my husband’s response: “Probably holding a stone in the crowd.”
Possibly. And for a couple weeks I held onto that image. The woman. Dragged into the square. Everyone talking. Her shame and sin for all to see. The man hiding in the shadows, ready to throw the first stone.
Until I read the passage again, a month or so later. Read the conversation she had with Jesus as she knelt on the ground, and saw this as I had so many times before:
“Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?” “No, Lord,” she said. And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.” John 8:10-11
He may have spoken it to that woman, but it applied to everyone in that crowd. Even the man. If we confess of our sins, we are then told to “go and sin no more.” We are given the opportunity to live a new life without shame. No one can cast a single stone because we no longer walk in that way. We no longer do those things. We no longer make those same choices. We hand him our sin. He forgives us, and we don’t do that thing ever again.
Woman. And man.
We all are given this opportuntiy because we could have stones cast at us. We could all look out at the crowd in guilt and shame. There may have been a woman kneeling there, but it could have easily been that man.
And Jesus would have offered him the same thing. Forgiveness. The opportunity to go and sin no more.
What’s that got to do with keeping records of wrongs? Well, think about it. Those people in the crowd couldn’t wait to stone that woman. And do we do this at times? Hold stones of judgment? Stones of all the things done against us, so we can throw them out at just the right time? Come on…admit it-we all throw stones like ammunition when we argue.
But Jesus doesn’t. He didn’t. He wanted to make sure no wrong could be held against the woman.
That she could leave that square without sin. Without shame.
When we throw stones, we shame all over again. And Jesus doesn’t do that. He doesn’t throw stones.
He offers us grace. Mercy. Forgiveness. A new way of life where sin lives “no more.”
To the woman. And yes…to the man.
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Encouragement is your business
Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. Ephesians 4:29
When you think of unwholesome talk, what do you think of? Some think of cursing. You know-swear words. Let’s be real-I am fond at times of swear words. Maybe not fond, but they feel really good when things are going really bad.
They just don’t sound so good to the person who hears them.
You know what else is unwholesome? Gossip. Oh yes…see Paul wasn’t just talking about cursing in this statement, he was talking about anything that dishonors him, and also others.
We are all guilty. “Did you hear? Let me tell you about…Mmmhmm, they sure did do that.” Gossip. It’s messy. And in my experience in the midst of these conversations, nothing encouraging is happening. There isn’t much building being done, but a lot of tearing.
Being involved it doesn’t feel as bad. Witnessing and hearing it…it feels and hears as bad as that curse word. It stings. I often leave the table, or pass by an overheard conversation and leave wondering: “What will be said about me when I walk away?”
Here is a question: Is what they are doing or have done any of your business? Probably not.
You know what is your business? Your prayer. Your encouragement. Your words-those that build up. Maybe choosing not to participate in the conversation that’s all up in someone’s business.
Your business? It’s not what they are doing. It is to be about your Father’s business-the encouraging business.
I do not own rights to music or song lyrics
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WWJD: Be a joy, not a jerk
Love is not rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable. 1 Corinthians 13:5, NLT
This post is a two-fer because these two principles work hand in hand. Words and the actions that come with them have power. In fact, Scripture discusses the power of words in many places. One such place is in James 3:8, when the tongue is described as “restless, evil and full of deadly poison” (NLT).
The tongue is deadly when words that are rude, mean, and filled with irritation shoot off of it like nothing. Using intentional hurtful actions driven by anger or hurt to make a point, won’t ensure a relationship will grow and flourish.
These kinds of words and actions can be hurtful. These kinds of words and actions are damaging. These words leave scars. These words and actions are deadly to relationships.
We have all been rude. Displayed bad manners, forgotten to speak to someone, cut someone off in traffic, interrupted someone, or said something hurtful unintentionally. I am not talking about bad manners.
I am talking about intentional hurt because we are irritated, or hurt ourselves. Provoking anger because we are angry. Retaliating because we are in our feelings, so we do something that will trigger a deep wound in another person. Ouch, you got me. Well, ha! I got you. now. Take that! A rude remark here. A silly response there. You lose your cool. You lack total self-control, come up out of your holy character, and before you know it, you have done things, and said things that have cut too deep to ever take back.
This is not an expression of love. Not at all.
According to the Kendrick brothers in The Love Dare, “When under pressure, love doesn’t turn sour. If you are walking under the influence of love, you will be a joy, not a jerk.”
Even when you are hurting, you can still be a joy to the person you love, and the ole brothers give three ways to honor our loved ones without being rude and irritable.
The first of these is putting into practice the Golden Rule. You know the one: “Do to others as you would like them to do to you.” (Luke 6:31, NLT). Would you want to be called crazy? Would you want to be dismissed when you had a concern? Ignored? Yelled at? Treated like a nuisance? Ridiculed? Criticized? Would you want someone to rage at you when you made a mistake, or use your weaknesses against you? Or would you want someone to treat you with compassion, listen when you had a concern with reassurance and patience, and accept your faults with grace?
The second, is thinking of how we treat others-like strangers. Think about it. Do we treat the UPS man, the grocer, the person we pass on the street, or our co-worker better than the people in our home? Or the person we profess to love? Do we offer them smiles, and the best of us, and then give those we cherish our leftovers, grunts, moans, or nothing at all? Let’s ensure we treat the people that mean the most to us with the utmost respect and honor.
Last, are you doing something you were asked not to do? Are you responding in a way you were previously asked not to, or doing something you know will trigger a negative response because you are upset? If a request has been made of you, or you know something bothers someone, just don’t do it. Doing otherwise is the opposite of a loving response. It’s actually pretty rude and nasty.
Want to be a joy, and not a jerk?
I think this pretty much sums it up. It is one of the greatest commandments provided by Jesus: “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Matthew 22:37-39, NLT
So, if you are waving “hello” to your neighbor, all smiles and joy…well, save a little for the ones closest to you as well. To the “neighbors” you spend time with behind closed doors. Those you interact with when you think no one else may be watching. Or listening. Give them all your joy, happiness, kind words, and loving responses, and a little less of your sarcastic quips, hurtful words, dismissive tones, and critical remarks.
Love is not rude. Love is not irritable. Love simply has no room to be a jerk.
Love is a joy.
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Y’all need Jesus
I love t-shirts. Let me rephrase that. I love t-shirts that have words on them. Sarcastic words. Rap words. Funny words. Jesus words. I like to say what needs to be said with my t-shirt. I started doing this at a time when I was silenced and ridiculed for outwardly expressing my faith more in one of the places I spent a great deal of time. I decided to wear it on a t-shirt instead.
Like this: “Y’all need Jesus!”
Now, I don’t have one that says this…though I do have one about coffee and Jesus, love and Jesus, prayer and Jesus, even tacos and Jesus. But I do have a sticker on the window of my vehicle that tells everyone who will read it that they all need Jesus.
But…here is the truth. We ALL need Jesus. Not just certain people. Not just the people who get on our nerves. Make fun of our faith, or our “Love Wins” t-shirts. ALL of us.
Every moment of our lives. Twenty-four, three six five. -Danny Gokey and Koryn Hawthorne
We all need prayer, because on any given day, we are all struggling. We all need comfort, because on any given day we may feel a little restless, a sense of chaos or loss; and need a little peace and hope. And there is not one who is immune to the devil who beats them down for every single bad thing they did, and knows exactly how to tell them, and repeat to them over and over and over that they are not good enough.
We ALL need Jesus.
Everybody needs a Savior
Even the ones who think they don’t
We’ve got stuff we hide, deep down inside
There’s so much that we don’t showMy t-shirts may be bold. I may speak a little sass with the messages I wear on the front of a tee. Words I can’t express out loud, because at a time I was silenced. I am often not one to hide from a story, but even I have wounds I don’t want to show.
I have stories I can’t yet quite tell, because there are still some cuts left to be healed. Band-aids not yet ready to be ripped off. I am not immune, and the prettied-up person with the button down sitting in the pew, too (not wearing a snarky tee)…oh, they got ’em, too. Things they hide, that is.
Basically, all of us, whether insiders or outsiders, start out in identical conditions, which is to say that we all start out as sinners. Scripture leaves no doubt about it: There’s nobody living right, not even one, nobody who knows the score, nobody alert for God. They’ve all taken the wrong turn; they’ve all wandered down blind alleys. Romans 3: 9-12, MSG
So, yes…We ALL need Jesus! Even t-shirt wearing, Jesus-loving, I bet you think I got it all together pastors. Prisoners. Beggars. Rich Folk.
We ALL need Him.
*I do not own rights to music/lyrics.
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His harvest in His time
Ah! Spring and warmer weather! How I enjoy watching the signs of spring to appear. Promise of more sunshine. Longer days. And it seems the long, gloomy days of winter are long gone. It also brings on the task of gardening.
I became a fan of gardening when my youngest was in elementary school. He would often come home from school, having held all his frenzied emotions in to get through a long, trying day; he released them on the people he deemed the most safe-those at home. Cooking was one way he would calm his wayward emotions, but gardening was our next go-to strategy to release the grip anxiety and autism had on his overwhelmed brain.
I found myself using plants and flowers last year in the throes of my own uncertainty while the world shut-down, and I meadered through an unexpected furlough. I desired the art of nurturing. And plants allowed that. They need to be nurtured, and I craved order; gardening does that, too. Demands order. Plus…it’s hard work. It is hard to keep your mind on anything chaotic when you are digging holes , digging in dirt, batting at flies, pulling weeds, and wielding a shovel or rake.
So I crafted a container garden on my back porch and got to work with transplanting some flowers, fruits and vegetables I could nurture and watch grow. And I did the same this year, as the dreary, cold winter days I tend to dread made way to promises of brighter days I look forward to. Brighter days with blooming flowers, green leaves, fruits on stems, and small shoots of vegetables peeking from tender green stems. I like watching the blooming.
In my garden, I have learned I hate to plant seeds. I’ve tried it, and each time I have failed. Nothing grows. I don’t even see a green leaf peeking out of the dirt.
Leaving me to believe a number of things: I failed. I am no good. I got it all wrong. Or I do what I do in my gardening state-avoid it altogether. I just don’t do that thing anymore. I’ll let the farmers do that thing instead.
I planted the seed in your hearts, and Apollos watered it, but it was God who made it grow. It’s not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What’s important is that God makes the seed grow. The one who plants and the one who waters work together with the same purpose. And both will be rewarded for their own hard work. For we are both God’s workers. And you are God’s field. You are God’s building. 1 Corinthians 3:6-9. NLT
Did you know this? By the time those green strawberry or jalapeno plants make it to your local nursery, secure in their little black containers, with green shoots, and ready to be transplanted into your garden…they have been growing for weeks, or months. For instance, it can take 3-6 months for a strawberry plant to be ready to transplant once planted from seed. Meaning that farmer worked in a field on that seed long before you got that plant home, has no clue where it ended up, and who it may be blessing. Yet, he is still in his field, planting seeds.
In some seasons I have been the planter of seeds in another’s heart. And sometimes I have been the one to water. Other times, someone else comes along, and waters something I have planted. I may not see the green leaves, or the blooms that my planting produced. I have no idea where that little seedling may have ended up.
But He does. God knows. Because God is the one who ultimately makes the seeds we plant grow. He is the one who is in charge of the blooming process. The timing. The when. The how.
We may play one small part in tending to God’s field. In helping His garden bloom, but He is the one in control of the entire process.
Who is chosen to plant the seed is up to Him. Who is chosen to come along and water what was already growing in the soil of the heart is up to him. When those flowers, or the fruit of His Spirit blooms is up to Him.
We may never see it. We never know exactly what part we played, but we can trust the process, because we know God will tend to what He wanted planted; and He won’t leave the harvest to wilt away.
We can trust God to tend to the blooms, to the harvest, and to show up in homes even when we can’t see.
But the seed in the good earth—these are the good-hearts who seize the Word and hold on no matter what, sticking with it until there’s a harvest. Luke 8:15,MSG
Whether you are the planter, or the one who waters; the seed-that is, the Word of God-once that seed is sent out, it will grow within the hearts of those God designed to bloom, in the ways and time He sees fit for His glory.
We may never see the harvest from what we have tended or planted, but once sent out, God will ensure the harvest is reaped. You keep planting. You keep watering. Let Him tend to the harvest.
About Me
I am January! Wife, mother, meemaw, pastor, and mental health provider who makes it through the day with my coffee, my journal, and my God. A simple human, navigating life through the messy and sometimes chaotic. All focused on Him.
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